keeping a commitment

I won’t screw me

This week we have been talking about the strong, concrete vision for our business as a magnet. Yesterday we turbo charged that magnet with our why, investing it with our hopes for ourselves, our “we” (the people we seek to provide for and protect) and our “one” (the world we want to change).

On the first page of your guide, you should something like this (this is mine):

I want: A thriving and diverse practice where I offer limited 1:1 coaching, and accessible group programs while also writing, speaking, and being a known source on marketing, mindsets, and change. I want a big platform, a small team, and a lot of supportive friends, clients, and colleagues who help me make my vision a reality, while I help them make their visions come true.

Because: (Me) I like to do those things! They make me feel alive, connected and creative. (We) I am also 100% committed to getting my family debt free in 2020, pandemic be damned! (One) And I truly believe that the world will be a better place when more people are getting the support they need to process their hurt and connect more deeply. If I can help the helpers, I can change the world.

With these pieces, the vision statement has become a powerful force, capable of creating and directing your motivation. Well done!

At the same time, it’s likely that when the vision statement becomes powerfully charged with your honest wants, hopes and desires, it will also bring up your honest fears, guilt, and worries.

Like any good magnet, because those worries have the same charge as the vision, they will compete, pushing each other around and never coming together.

We need to resolve those competitions, by changing the charge of your worries so they add to the power of the vision instead of competing with it.

Resolving competing commitments

When a worry pops up you might have the urge to shove it down, insisting that you can brute force your way past it. I understand that impulse, and there’s absolutely a place for persistence in this pursuit of your vision.

But, right now, as we excavate our vision you want to listen to and honor that voice of fear.

Instead of pretending it doesn’t exist, ask it a few questions. In my experience, vision brings up fears around failure, success, burnout, and other people. What if:

  • I fail, and…
  • I succeed, and…
  • It’s hard, and…
  • Everyone knows, and…

Look for these boxes in your guide, and finish the statements:

how to keep a commitment

Be honest with yourself! Listen to your worries and fears like a mother would listen to a child. Validate that the worries are real. And acknowledge that you might very well have gone too far in the past, losing things that matter to you (like your health, happiness, or relationships).

And then introduce the idea that you are not powerless in this pursuit. Know that you can CHOOSE to get what you want without blowing up every good thing in your life.

You CAN get what you want without losing what you have… but you have to commit to one thing, first.

I wont screw me

The truth is that every change has unintended consequences. You might start writing every morning and entirely displace your daily workout. You might start reaching out to channel partners and find yourself too busy to keep up with the social life you had before you began building your business. These things will happen!

The key to working towards a vision without freaking out at every unintended consequence, is to commit with an equal force to this mantra:

I wont screw me.

I know it’s crass, but these are the words that give me comfort at the end of a long day of banging my head against the mousetrap of technology that keeps my blog-website-coaching practice afloat. “That sucked. But don’t worry. I won’t screw me.”

Embedded in that 4-word statement is the rock solid commitment to use my keen powers of observation, critical thinking, and problem solving skills to ensure that working this vision doesn’t stress my Me, We, or One beyond what’s healthy.

Specifically,

  • I refuse to be at the mercy of my success. If I start to burn out, I’ll change the way I’m doing it. This allows me to let success happen, instead of sabotaging it for fear that I wont be able to handle it.
  • I will hustle in the short term, but I will resolve anything that grinds away at my life force for any period of time by hiring help sooner rather. I am not stranded in my business! I will surround myself with the support that I need.
  • I will say no when I am full. I will say no when I don’t want to. I will say no when it’s not a good fit. I am the boss of my business and I wont be jerked around by other people’s expectations.

These are the commitments I make to ensure that I am working my vision in a healthy, balanced way.

What do you need to commit to?

In the summary box at the bottom of this page of the guide, summarize your commitments to yourself. “I will pursue my vision while making sure that…”

Doing this transforms your worry from a competitor to your vision, to a safety measures that ensure your vision can thrive. It calms your worry machine, by bringing it onto the team.

Congratulations- you now have a powerful vision that you can pursue with enthusiasm. And tomorrow, I’ll help you get started.

Wahoo!

Mindset coach near me

About the Author Amanda

Amanda Crowell, PhD is a cognitive psychologist obsessed with how people make change. She is best known for translating cutting edge research into practical strategies that can be used right away.

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